How to Unclutter Your Soul
By Trina McNeilly, author of the newly released “Unclutter Your Soul” book
Do you have an overactive mind that often leaves you paralyzed from moving forward and living life to the fullest? Have you ever felt as if your inner life is tight, busy, or chaotic?
Five years ago, it became very clear to me that my inner home (as I like to call it) was extremely cluttered. I was living in a constant state of overwhelm. My parents were going through a lengthy divorce process (my ideals and identity were completely upheaved), dear grandparents began dying, we faced family addictions, I experienced a health scare, there was stress in my marriage and finances, and we left our beloved home.
My soul was cluttered with crippling anxiety and depression, emotional pain, unhealthy coping mechanisms and behavioral patterns, and chronic stress.
I was completely and utterly overwhelmed, sometimes to the point of not being able to get out of bed.
The thing about overwhelm is that sometimes we inch our way towards it, one thought at a time, and other times it’s heaved upon us with no warning or explanation. However you come upon it (or it comes upon you) you, it’s certain to leave you weighed down and wondering how to get out from under it.
What do we do with all of our overwhelm? All of our soul clutter?
Things I’ve tried (and, ahem, not an exhaustive list):
-Ignoring things, sticking my head in the sand and pretending things aren’t happening
-Running away, whether to a faraway place or my closet
-Daydreaming of rescue (who could fix this for me)?
-Overthinking (a.k.a. worry, rumination, catastrophizing, spiraling, creating narratives)
-Trying to solve “what doesn’t make sense” like I’m Sherlock Holmes
-Keeping secrets and carrying the weight all on my own
-Distracting myself (a.k.a doom scrolling, therapy shopping, treating myself to hamburgers and fries)
I realize this won’t be a surprise, but not one of those strategies (written with a grin) worked for me. However, as I began to unpack my soul clutter, and my unhealthy coping mechanisms (I’ve written in detail about each in my book)*, I not only learned why they were not working for me but I discovered what does work:
-Observing
-Owning
-Overcoming
Observe.
I was already observing in many regards (because if you are an over overthinker you already know how to do this). However, I didn’t know how to observe without judging myself. I didn’t know how to continue unpacking at my own pace (others will be in a hurry with you, but God is not) and I didn’t know how to continue on and to take action.
As I kept in step with the Spirit (not the pace of change and action of others I was scrolling past on Instagram), I kept observing and unpacking and un-layering. Observing, I learned, will afford you the insight you need to move into the next stage. Paying attention precedes change. When we know what needs to change, we are empowered to change.
Own.
Owning is taking what we observe and telling ourselves the truth about it. I had to learn to own my actions, my attitudes, my behavior, my choices—even if the overwhelm didn’t begin with me. We own the opportunity to do something with all of our pain. No one has the power to save us except for Jesus, and then ourselves. He is the Savior of our souls and we are the guardians of our own change. Owning asks us to walk in the freedom that Christ has already paid for. Look at these life-changing words in Isaiah 52:2 (NIV): “Free yourself from the chains on your neck, Daughter of Zion, now a captive.” If we don't remove the chains, if we don’t walk out of the tight spaces, we aren’t experiencing the abundant life Christ paid for. It’s not the fairy wand that vanishes the chain; it’s the child of God who understands their freedom enough to slide the broken chain off.
Overcome.
Overcome is a word that can hold a lot of nuance. As a Christian I knew (since I was a teen) that Christ calls us overcomers. I didn’t feel like one. It certainly didn’t seem like I was overcoming. I needed a better understanding of who I was in Christ. If He calls me an overcomer than I must believe that I am one. 1 John 5:4 tells us that our faith is the victorious power that triumphs the world. We don’t achieve this status of overcomer by hustling and striving to overcome by our own grit and determination. We begin to overcome what is overwhelming us when we begin to understand who we are in Christ—overcomers. The other thing to know about overcoming is that it’s something that we do—it’s not an elusive arrival; it’s participation with the Spirit. It’s ongoing-ness. We can practice overcoming in our everyday life.
I don’t know what, particularly, is overwhelming you, but I do know the feeling of being frozen with depression, anxiety, fear and aversion to change. Friend, I want you to know that you are not alone. The creator of the universe is with you, willing to create a custom plan of healing just for you. The Holy Spirit, your–ever-present help is leading you, with the torchlight of his love, on step and one box at a time to unpack all that is crowding your soul. And, I’d like to be a friend that helps guide you through your very own space making process. Let’s create space for more peace and joy, in our everyday lives, together!
About Trina McNeilly
Trina McNeilly is an author, speaker, and founder of the popular lifestyle blog LA LA LOVELY, where she has been sharing matters of the heart as well as design-related finds for a decade. Hailing from a third generation newspaper family, Trina is right at home writing, editing, selling ads, and publishing. Trina’s work also includes creative direction, styling, design projects, and freelance writing. She has been featured in The New York Times, The Land of Nod Catalog, DESIGN MOM: How to Live with Kids: A Room-by-Room Guide, Apartment Therapy, and Style Me Pretty Living. While she has done a lot writing on the topic of decorating homes, Trina’s true passion is helping to bring the message of finding our home in the person of Jesus. Her heart’s desire is to introduce others to the love of the Father. Through Him, we find our identity and a full life that can start in even the emptiest of places. Find Trina’s new book "“Unclutter Your Soul” in the reSOURCEs below.
Trina’s reSOURCEs:
Visit Trina’s website at trinamcneilly.com
Follow on Instagram @trina_mcneilly
Follow on Facebook @trinamcneillyauthor
Order Trina’s new book UNCLUTTER YOUR SOUL
Check out Trina’s La La Lovely blog