A New Beginning: Stronger and Wiser

Uncategorized

Nov 16

Written By

By Whitney Wiser Savage,
professional body builder, speaker, and founder of WiserFit

I was broken and bruised, and my dreams were crushed. In 2011, I was lying in a hospital bed being told by doctors I would have to learn how to walk again. I was told my competitive sports career was over -- I would probably never be able to compete in bodybuilding again – and I should prepare myself for this new reality.

The way I ended up there was by hands of someone who had told me he loved me. So how did I get there? Let me back up and start from the beginning of my story...

From a young age, I have always identified myself as an athlete. I played sports year-round every year from the age of 9 all through high school and into college. As I was graduating college, I had no idea what I was going to do with my competitive athlete side. But just at the perfect time, I found the sport of bodybuilding.

I had no idea what I was getting myself into as I reluctantly started preparing for a competition. It was a rough road, but eventually I found a new love in the rigid, disciplined life of competing in the bodybuilding and fitness world. I was so intrigued and dedicated to this new world that I ended up being pretty good after a couple years. I was winning shows all over the country at a national level. Within two years, I was well on my way to earning my pro status, which I had NEVER even thought possible. I was getting nationwide recognition for winning two back-to-back national level shows.

Then came that horrible day that changed everything. I had already made the decision to leave an abusive relationship about a week prior. My ex-boyfriend wanted to meet up to talk about things. The conversation ended with him not only leaving in a rage, but running over me with his SUV in the parking lot at my job. I was caught under the vehicle, dragged across the parking lot, and eventually crushed under the rear tire. I was left lying in the parking lot with a crushed spine, roadburn all over my body, and struggling to breathe. I didn’t know how badly I had been injured at that moment, but the pain was excruciating. All I could do was to cry out to God to take the pain away by any means possible.

When emergency medical responders and police arrived, though seriously injured I was coherent enough to give a detailed description of my ex-boyfriend and his vehicle that had run me over. State Troopers were able to track him down, speeding down the interstate. He was arrested and taken to jail.

I was transported to Vanderbilt Medical Center to have emergency back surgery. Metal rods and screws were fused into my spine, and I was then admitted into the Trauma Unit. After a week in the hospital, I was released to live with my parents and begin the road to recovery. My mind still couldn’t comprehend the level of destruction that had just happened to my body; I still remember being confused and shocked when my parents told me I would be coming to live with them for a while. I thought they would just take me back to my apartment -- I didn’t understand that I could not walk.

In spite of the damage done to my body, in my mind and in my heart I KNEW there was no way I was giving up on my dream of becoming a professional athlete. No one around me believed I would ever make it back to the stage, but I wouldn’t allow any seeds of doubt to be planted in my mind from anyone. If they tried, I made it clear that they could keep their doubts to themselves after that. God gave me a strong sense of stubbornness (I like to call it resilience!) that has aided me in overcoming a lot!

I HAD to have HOPE and the FAITH that God would redeem it all. Somehow, someway… I knew that if I kept my faith and kept progressing forward, He would bring me through it.

The journey was long and hard. But incredibly, just a year later I was able to get back on stage. I had some devastating defeats but I never stopped pressing forward. Not only did I still receive my pro status in the sport three years later, I went on to qualify and compete with the best pro athletes in the world on the Olympia stage in 2016. God really did redeem it all! I reached a dream that most pro athletes never accomplish.

With this platform God has given me, I have the ability to empower women on a large scale through fitness and so much more. I decided to retire from competing in 2018 and start my own all-female bodybuilding & fitness competition for the purpose of bringing women together to connect, encourage, and empower each other!

As I grew the show and added other events, God started bringing so many more strong women into my life to help guide me over the years as mentors, coaches, friends, and clients. I believe that the power of proper alignment in life is the KEY to having the life God has meant for you and living out the purpose you’re called to fulfill. I love the quote, “If you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go together!” I used to be such a loner. But now I see the value of being aligned with the right people in the right relationships. Living our best life depends on it!

Wisdom from Whitney: Why you should leave an abusive relationship.

People often ask me, “Why didn’t you leave that toxic relationship sooner?” I’ve also been asked, “Were there ever any red flags and did you see them?”

My answer to the first question is more in-depth below. As for the red flags, yes of course I saw them, but I didn’t know what they were or that they were even called “red flags”. We all see the red flags in certain situations… the difference comes in recognizing them for what they are and then how we choose to respond to them.

Do we rationalize them in our minds until we downplay them so much that they aren’t so red anymore? Or do we stand up for ourselves and know we are deserving of so much more? Do we trust our gut instinct, or do we stay because we fear the unknown? Do we stay because it’s easier to stay in what we know (even if it’s miserable) than to go try something different and unfamiliar?

Maybe I feared, subconsciously, that I wouldn’t be able to get a better man. Maybe deep down I didn’t think I was worth anything better. I thought maybe most men are just like that -- controlling and jealous – or, as I rationalized at the time, “protective.”

I found myself thinking maybe he was right...maybe no one else would ever love me...? All these thoughts and so many more flooded the back of my mind… before I was even consciously aware they were there.

The truth is, I didn’t know what qualified as “abuse” or toxic behavior back then or that those behaviors weren’t just somewhat normal. The only reason I finally had the courage to leave the relationship was because he had finally put his hands on me and tried to strangle me one night, simply because he saw my ex-boyfriend at an event we were attending. It caused him to become enraged. It was then that I finally had the “proof” I thought I needed to leave… the bruises all around my throat.

Like many young women, I had always thought I had to have “proof” to leave a relationship… and well, there is no hard evidence you could present to a judge on mental and emotional abuse. Physical abuse offers proof, but if a man hasn’t hit you, is “abuse” really happening?

It wasn’t until years later that I learned ...you do not have to have proof to leave an unhealthy relationship! You have the right to choose what relationships, romantic or not, are suiting you and helping you to become your best self and the ones that are not, without explanation.

God wants us to be happy, joyful and live to our fullest potential. We can never live out the purpose He has called us to live if we are in wrong relationships that cause us pain and low self-worth.

Even if someone tells you that they love you, it’s important to know what “love” really is to be able to discern if it’s true or not. Some people may not really understand what love is, so it’s important to consider that people may have different definitions of what love actually is. For most of my life, I had always thought love was a feeling or an emotion. But as I got older, I realized Love is SO MUCH MORE than simply a feeling. Feelings come and go, emotions are fleeting. Love is a choice.

I began to understand what love is by looking at God’s definition of love, which can be found in His Word. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 says:

Love is patient.

Love is kind.

It does not envy. It does not boast.

It is not proud. It does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking.

It is not easily angered, It keeps no records of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

God’s unconditional love is perfect. But we live in a world that is far from perfect. In order for me to know what that even felt like, first I had to learn how to even be able to receive love. How did I do this? By spending A LOT of time alone with myself and alone with God. And that was very uncomfortable at first. But as I leaned on God more and more, it slowly but surely became empowering. I grew to understand what “unconditional love” actually looks like and feels like… it means not having to work for it or prove anything in order to get it. It is a free gift from God, but understanding that with my head and my heart took time.

A verse that I found myself using constantly to reassure myself through these times was 2 Timothy 1:7:

God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of POWER, LOVE and SOUND MIND.

I had lost the ability to trust myself to make good decisions about relationships, even after what happened to me. This verse reassured me that the anxiety and fear that I felt through this process was not from God...a reminder to myself that God was within me; therefore, I am Powerful, I am Love and I DO have a sound mind capable of making good decisions for my life. Learning to trust myself and love myself was a very intentional process that took time.

God’s timing is perfect.

As much as we might not like God’s timing, His timing is perfect! While God was preparing my heart, He was also preparing a man for me over those years. A patient and understanding man who loves and supports me. I didn’t believe it when people would say, “When he’s the one, you will just know!”

It turns out… it’s true, they were right. It did not take long for me to identify all the qualities I wanted and needed in a man and in a relationship when I started dating RJ earlier this year. We are now engaged to get married next year!

I thank God for him, and for all the people He has brought into my life over the past few years who are all mission-driven, faith-filled people who are passionate about empowering others to be successful in all aspects of their lives. Having hope and a purpose is what continues to drive me to be all that God has called me to be, and now I have a team of support to do it with. Don’t be afraid to embrace God’s new beginning for your life!

About Whitney Wiser

Whitney Wiser stands in front of a tree in athletic wear, stretching her left arm across her body.

Whitney Wiser is an overcomer of what could have been insurmountable odds. She was well on her way to the big leagues of competitive bodybuilding when she was run over and crushed by an SUV as a result of ending an abusive relationship. After having her spine fused back together and learning how to walk again, Whitney not only made her way back to bodybuilding, but also achieved pro athlete status, competing on the Olympia stage as one of the greatest fitness athletes in the world. In 2015, Whitney founded Wiser Fitness with the mission of empowering people to strengthen their body. She leads with the understanding that a person’s health and wellness in their physical body is a byproduct of the condition of their mind and spirit. In 2017, she formed Fit Life Productions to host events, retreats, and coaching on a wider scale to inspire confidence and strength. “I believe without a doubt that with faith in God and a positive mindset, we are all capable of anything.”

Whitney’s reSOURCEs

Television story feature

Whitney’s TEDx talk “How to Overcome”

Whitney’s Favorite books:

Power Thoughts and Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyers

(I read both of these books during my recovery when I was learning to walk again)

Soulprint by Mark Batterson

Girls with Swords by Lisa Bevere

Do It Afraid by Joyce Meyers

Visioneering by Andy Stanley

Follow Whitney:

IG pages: